Hate, It’s What’s For Dinner!

All this hate I keep coming up with! Is it hate speech, is it a hate crime, is it hate that divides, is it hate that we conquer! Is it the hate we don’t want to admit when you get cut off  in traffic and say fucking ni**er! When it’s a woman and you say that bitch doesn’t know how to drive. When it’s in a grocery store and you see the lady from another country using an EBT card and your response is go back to your own country? I guess my question is America, just what kind of hate are we talking about here? Hate that has the power to get a man elected to the highest office in probably the world? Hate that is making the victims the bad guys? Hate that we have turned away and looked away from for so long we have accepted it and made it okay? Right there is your answer America and some day probably sooner than later we are going to have to answer for it. All these mother fuckers running around doing shit in the name in the name of the God I believe in, who are worse than half the mother fuckers in jail, let’s just be honest! Say something America, like the song says, I’m giving up on you! Red or Blue, Trump or Obama, I swear on my momma all this bull shit we are worried about and are letting go on won’t mattet in the end! We are all going to die, so in the words of Rodney King, CANT WE ALL JUST FIGURE IT THE FUCK OUT AND GET ALONG? Tired of kids getting shot in school, tired of the heroin epidemic taking kids before they ever have a chance! Tired of reading stories like part of a park in France is used for sex trafficking and prostitution! Tired of it all man, and you don’t have to believe in the Bible to see the parallels to back in the day when they all got wiped out! The lawlessness and lack of caring for your fellow-man can end you, it’s ended people before and for that matter entire populations! Hate may just be what’s for dinner, but it doesn’t have to be. What we, you and I do right now will maybe matter more than anytime in our history, there are moves to be made too save it all and change it all, moves that we need a few good men and women with some guts to step up and make! What changes the world is courage beyond what you think you’re capabale of! That MLK or Lincoln type of shit, this isn’t right, I may lose my life for standing against it and I can live with that! Real men, real courage, until we figure that out, hate will continue to be what’s for dinner!

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I Hate White People!

I’m 41 and lily-white, so let’s get that out of the way from the jump! I hate rich, white corporate people, I guess I should have clarified! You know the ones taking 9 figure bonuses while people are dying who can’t afford their drugs! Yeah, those douchebags, not a big fan! I hate that White guy in the White House, that this White guy voted for! I get that I will never get what it’s like to be black, I get I probably wouldn’t get shot in my own apartment! I hate that it’s my fault and every other white persona fault when shit like that happens! Because in the end, there are bad people in every race, color and creed, if we are all honest! I hate that nobody is honest anymore, it’s all half-truths and what they want you to hear. I hate that when someone speaks the truth, they are an asshole and everyone’s feelings get hurt! I hate that we the people have become we the pussies and let it get this far! I’d like to believe like Luke Bryan that most people are good, but lately? I’m having a real hard time convincing myself of that! You know what I hate the most? Because I used the word hate, that’s prolly why you read this post….. we will get back to this in a couple of hours folks!

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What Will They Remember!

The good times? At this point there just hasn’t been enough of them. And lately what should be good time has all the good time sucked out of it by the stress and the walls crumbling down on me! Built it up on bullshit and now I find my temper razor thin and find myself getting mad at those closest too me and I have no fucking clue at all why! I mean I guess the why is the easy part, it’s all starting to catch up with me at 41! All the things I put off, because I was sure I was going to have time for them! Then the cancer came and took my grandfather in his eighties! His mom lived until she was 104 and he was so healthy, I knew I had time! Now the time that I thought I had is fleeting, it’s going to take more than the holy water at the river Eminem! The marks in the L colloum are starting to mount up, I think more now about what they will remember more than what could have been! Sometimes I think what could of been is so far gone it can never be, but if I admit that, I admit defeat. And this I do firmly believe, there is but only one thing and or person on this earth that can defeat you. And that is the mother fucker looking back at you in the mirror in the morning. The mother fucker who looks back at you and says today is the day that we beat it. The face that looks back and tells you that you can’t, defeat isn’t a real live thing, that only happens in sports or competition! We let ourselves be defeated in our mind first! Then we worry about what they are saying, or what could have been or what they will remember! Once you choose to lose the battle in your mind, that’s when it’s all over. That’s when bad thoughts creep in, that’s when you stop getting back up off the mat, that’s when it’s all over. Trust someone who has put them self thru hell and back at 41. Trust someone who has lost and had things slip thru his hands that damn near broke him. Trust someone who has had to sit and watch others get his opportunities because of the choices he made! Trust me it hurts, trust me that it sucks and trust me that it’s not over! Hold on, make it happen, figure out a new plan or a new way to attack it and promise a guy whose still at the bottom fighting just like you this. That you’ll fIght, you’ll comeback swinging or you will go down swinging, but either way, you’ll give them something to remember!

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Did We Sell Are Soul To The Devil In The Process?

The process surely wasn’t supposed to be like that. It’s the left, it’s the right, it’s a senator from Zona, it’s Mrs. Collins whose constituents will handle that! I want to talk about change, I want to talk about how I was a screw up and figured it all out and cane up with a new plan! I want to quit hearing the voices about what I did, I want them to see the comeback! Any old mother fucker can run their mouth and talk about it, we all have lips! Speaking of lips, ladies I have a question for you! Your lips look just fine, why would you inject your lips with that shit? Why would you dress like that too while we are at it? You know that you are just asking for it stupid, in my Brett Kavanaugh voice! America I have a question for you! How can he be a judge, when he couldn’t handle being judged, when his own back yard wasn’t clean! Be careful young men, I have a warning for you, it’s a dangerous time for you! My voice echoing in the background mocking sexual assault victims! Hey, here’s a novel fucking idea! There’s a few girlfriends who weren’t happy in the end, but not one of them would say I laid a hand on or sexually assaulted them! I may have a head with no fucking screws in it but I know right from wrong, so do all you shit bags out there defending your actions! To all you kids out there, I am involved with kids and bring a kid can be brutal enough! In the end, fat, someone having less than you or looking or having different circumstances than you won’t matter! What will matter will be when you look back on it all. And at 41 I look back on it all now and think how could I have done some of the things I’ve done and how the  fuck did I ever let it go down like this. So cut them some slack, include them, be a kid and let them be a kid. I had two pretty good parents! A lot of kids unfortunately don’t have one, doesn’t matter if their in Jordan’s or ten-dollar off the rack at Wal-mart shoes, we are all fucking people man. And man, I sure feel that we have lost track of that somewhere along the line! And now I fear we have been toeing this line a little too long and somehow in this whole process, I feel like the devil one! But the devil will tell you himself, that the devil is in the details. He doesn’t have to be there, we put him there, so your move my friend!

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So You Don’t Like The Game!

Then change the game, break the rules, I guess I’m hoping you’ve all had enough like me! I could tell you it was going to be easy, I could tell you that you won’t waste years of your life chasing it! But even if I try to spin those wasted years into lessons, the lessons are getting longer and the years shorter! I hope you are right Luke Bryan about those streets of gold, and I’ll be a believer until the day I die! Judge me, that’s fine, that’s all we do anymore anyway, but I ask you this? If you’re judging me for being Christian, isn’t that like me judging you for being gay? Hey, I’m just saying! Because there are a whole bunch of us out here who are sitting in the pews Sunday who could care less who you sleep with! Born and raised Christian here, lean more right than left on any given Sunday, but if there is a God that I believe in, let’s, let him be God! Let’s not try to be bigger than God, let’s understand we all have differences, let’s work together for real change! Not some Democrat for four years and then some republican who undoes all of it when he takes office or vice versa! Let’s change the game, let’s flip the script on all the bastards flipping the script on us. Let’s maybe use are brains and remember the Bible has good things, it has been written and interpreted by man for so long that well! Gods word is in there, I fully believe that, but to follow it to the tee? Hell, apparently the holiest people on the planet can’t do that and lately some of them seem to be the worst! Think what you want about Kavanaugh, but the President mocked a woman claiming sexual harassment and the crowd cheered! In the United States of America in 2018! Let that shit sink in while you are waving your flag and playing your proud to be an American country song! I guess while we are taking shots, let’s get a few off my chest! Naw, maybe I leave that up to Kavanaugh, maybe I’ll adress it in a few hours tune in, this one can’t end that way! This one has to end with hope, this one has to end with us laying down are differences and finding an answer, United we stand, divided we fall, they are trying to divide us! They have used the divide against us to get us too this point, Hate can’t win, a divide is man-made! The shit man made and put in food and drinks causes cancer! Maybe I can’t say why little tommy has to be in a wheel chair, maybe he’s there because there is a bigger plan for him, I can go on about maybe, but I can’t go on living the way that man tells me too!

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Wait, What Was That Senator?

I tend to lean right, but this just isn’t right, the highest court in the land! Did she just really say the people the victim accuses said they weren’t there or they couldn’t remember? Well no shit senator Collins, did you expect them all to jump up at once with their hands in the air saying I did it? Wouldn’t that shit be great, I’m sure it’s old Soros’s fault or the Easter Bunny, naw, it’s ususlly all about interests and money! I could go on and on about the politics, but I’m trying to raise a two-year old daughter and I’m losing the battle with her mother. And the screaming and name calling have turned into a senate confirmation hearing and I’m just not sure we like each other anymore! I look into those two year old eyes and it’s so hard to give up the fight, but every single day all we do is fight. I used to see an end and some sort of light, but lately these days it’s just dark as night! These thoughts that are in my head, well I know there not right, but I’m tired of the lies and crap. Built it all on shit and now as you face the final collapse, you grab your lungs for air, but all you do is gasp, what a sight you’ve become! And now all that’s left to come, is the questions about how you turned out to be a bum. Whispers saying look at him now, we thought he’d be so much more and no more time and bad thoughts are all you have left. You played with the devil in the margins and you missed that the devil was in the details. And now looking back at forty-one it’s thoae details that get you. Get you late at night and don’t let you sleep. Get you every waking second of every day, telling you it’s over. Telling you this is where your story ends and this is what you have let yourself become. No comeback, just game over, thanks for playing, you could have and should have tried harder! I guess that’s what gets me the most, is the effort I put in. I question the effort we as a country have put in and I wonder how much longer we can let things slide? I knew I wasn’t that guy, until I was. Maybe you aren’t where you want too be, but be better than yesterday, because one day, even at 41, you can have your day, and that can change anything!

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I Want A Screw Over!

Whoops, never mind, I meant do over! I mean I think I deserve one. I may have really fucked it up this time, but I’m not Cosby and Kavanaugh giving them the “juice!” Perfect by no means, but my momma raised me better than that, and my daddy whipped my ass with a stick when necessary! Now a days you discipline your kid or touch a quarterback and everyone loses their damn mind! There comes a time where whatever it is that doubts us can’t stop us anymore, it becomes all but an afterthought! A point where maybe we can get a do over, because we realize that no matter how bad. No matter how deep the water, how far up that creek we get, five feet eleven inches deep, there’s still a chance! We gave up on hope a long time ago and resigned ourselves to this is just the way it is. The worst thing you can do is accept it because you’ve given up, only you can stop you! See you have fans out there on both sides! Secretly hoping you keep falling flat on your face. Secretly pulling for you and hoping this time you get it right, because what it could be! To the person thinking about committing suicide tonight, you could be the person! The person as Tupac says that makes the change! The person who changes the world, cure childhood cancer, makes a difference, but you have to be here for that to ever happen! You can’t have a do over if you aren’t here to do it, it isn’t over the battle you are losing right now isn’t a war, win the war! To the si how mom barely making it happen, keep making it happen, those kids are now and always will be worth it! Life will come at you like no other, keep coming back for more, the only screw over is if you lay down and that’s a choice! I’m finding a lot of life, Hell all of life is about the choices we make, and mine have to be better, bet yours could be too;-)

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