Something’s got me thinking this might be the end, but I promise you’ll miss me if it happens! My whole life, don’t screw this one up, life is to short and now I wonder a lot of things! I’m past the stage of feeling sorry for myself and making excuses, depressed is a choice fight it! It’s funny the things we do to ourselves and how we choose to punish ourselves, in this moment where I have to figure it out, I realize I’m still not fucking over it and that is why I am still here! The things we don’t deal with keep us trapped in the past and we will never get to our future living that way, I promise you! Fuck man, how do you let go when you know you have too, but so badly don’t want too? You know it has been a year, but nothing other than your best friends six-year-old daughter going way to soon has hurt this bad! I just wish I could wake up with amnesia and forget all 8 months of it, because that 8 months changed my heart and I don’t know how to fix it! Came upon a song by a band called 5 seconds of summer called Amnesia and it hit the nail on the head! “I wish that I could wake up with amnesia and forget about the stupid little things, like the way it felt to fall asleep next too you, because I’m not fine at all.” And I don’t know if I will ever be fine again, I’m tired of losing things that matter because I didn’t give a fuck about anything other than myself and getting stoned! So tonight what I want lies next to someone else and I sit here like the little bitch I got treated like! What is my point to this post? Don’t screw this up, you only get one shot at this life and life is far shorter than you think! So think about this, I chose to screw it up and what I want lays next to someone else a mile and a half up the street and I am blogging to you….