We All Want What We Ain’t Got!

It’s The Sleeping Alone I Can’t Handle!

I let the lab come up and sleep next to me; it helps me forget what used to lay there and what used to matter. Funny what your mind can do isn’t it? You can look at a picture and say she’s aged or she doesn’t look good or even you are in better shape, but none of that matters when what you want is in the picture! Funny how in the moment you are so mad about something and then just a little further down the road you thank God that it went down the way that it did, because it was supposed to. It would have been worse if it had gone down the way that you wanted it to go down, but you don’t see that, you just keep going down. Fading and letting it all drift away into the nothingness that has become what is left of this life that you have created! Would you tempt fate for that one shot? We all want what we ain’t got as the song says and today I have to push. I have to poke the stick; I have never been this close before. It may get worse, I may fall flat on my face and get laughed at and look like a bigger joke than I ever have in my entire life, but that’s the chance you take when you tempt fate. When you pissed away every opportunity you have ever had, but then you have that moment of clarity where you remember it is still all in your hands. That one shot in every person’s life that life gives you to have it all or change it all, I pissed it all away, but that moment is close I can feel it in my blood and this time I will be ready. It is this sleeping alone that I can’t handle anymore it is Thanksgiving tomorrow not being where I want to be, December 25th I will be where I want to be and I will have what I want to have, life is too short and fucked up not too. Kids dying, be scared or maybe don’t be scared of Ebola are they even telling us the truth? The truth is, it is about time for all of us to start pushing the envelope and tempting fate and seeing what happens. I believe the remedy to every problem we have starts and ends with you and I, so it would appear you and I got some work to do……

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