It’s Closing In On Me!
The opportunity has one more time presented itself, will I sink or swim? I guess this is just how it goes, I am lucky it has presented itself so many times and I have thumbed my nose at it and now it is directly in front of me again. I feel different about it this time though, at first I thought it was closing in on me, but now as I close in on 500, I realize this time I went after it and I am closing in on it! It was never going to end me, lessons had to be learned and tolls had to be paid, but now that I have paid them, I have figured some things out and I have become one hell of a dangerous person! I can’t be mad about it because I know it is my fault, but I understand what I did now and I don’t feel bad about it anymore because I simply can’t. I can’t let it concern me, directly in front of me is my last shot at any chance of a life. My one shot, my one opportunity, my lose yourself Emenim moment, every other moment that I thought I had failed I hadn’t, it was getting me ready for this moment, because this fucking moment here is all that matters. Tonight I got a text telling me that nobody cares what I did, people forgive, what the hell am I going to do. I can’t hide out here in Ohio anymore, I have too much shit to face and fix and it all starts in Olympia, I am to old and to tried to run from it anymore, I have to grab this bitch with everything I got, because with one text I got tonight everything got turned on its head and everything I though, well it turned out to be wrong and now I get one last shot to do something about it and bet your ass I am going to take it and make it happen! I have let it go down this way for to long and now it is closing in on me and this is my one chance to flip the script and close in on it. I thought I would be fine, I wasn’t going to be, but what happened tonight is going to be a game changer, I got a text from the Father of the Little girl in Heaven who started this whole thing and made me want to be better and change. I can’t change or fix what I did, but I can apologize and make them realize I have learned and it wont happen again. It doesnt have to be oh well that’s just how it goes this time, you can decide how it goes if you choose to close in on it instead of letting it close in on you!